24 Januari 2013, 12 Rabiul Awal 1434 - Alhamdulilah, perjalanan yg dimulakan oleh aku, suami dan Aisyah lebih 4 tahun yg lalu telah mencapai maksudnya pada hari bersejarah ini, dgn izin Allah yg Maha Pemurah lg Maha Mengasihani. Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, wa lillahilhamd....
Too much things going on, too little time to write. Ni nak fokus utk the trip back home plak. Will write the whole viva experience soon, time permitting, In Shaa Allah...
Kalo ikutkan hati, I wanted to do something special for Aisyah's leaving 'do with several of her close friends at school. Something cool like buat a parting party ke, outing ke. Tp telek2 poket kalendar, mcm x cukup duit masa la plak. But wouldn't be just so nice? One last chance utk dia mengukir memori bersama kawan2? (ni siapa yg terlebih sebak ni x tahu la, budak ke, mak budak).
Anyway, I'm just glad that whilst she was here, she made some good friends, and was included in many celebrations. Amongst the most memorable would have to be Julia's Birthday party late last year, celebrated at the Drake's Den Soft Play Area. Julia ni kawan baik Aisyah masa nursery, and altho they went to different Primary Schools afterwards, her Mom wanted us to come. The party consisted of 20 or so children, and it was fun and well-organised.
The grown ups had fun too. In fact, ni ajo lah my Mummy friends yg rapat. Other mothers seem to bond well and very chummy over the school playground, tp aku mcm x sempat nak mesra sgt. Sbb utama, I was always rushing to Uni in the morning, and dashing like mad, always out of breath, from Uni at pickup. I didn't have the luxury of gossiping 10-15 minutes at the school gate like many mothers do, or volunteering at any school events, much less taking an active roll in the Parent-Student Association meetings (shame on me!). How I wish I could be active you know. Mmg men-jeles-kan, tgk ibu2 lain after pick up beramai2 berjanji2 bwk anak2 swimming, or to the museum, or for play dates over coffee. Aku? terkocoh2 amik anak, then bg dia mkn, sambil2 masak for dinner, all the while anxiously menunggu Hubs balik kerja so that I can swap child care with him and sambung study. Such was the life. But I don't think Aisyah suffered, coz other than at school, she is always with either one or both of her parents. And one things for sure, I never, ever missed reading/homework time with her. Busy mcm mana, sakit mcm mana pon mummy dia, homework time is exclusively put aside. So is bed time reading session.
Ok, pjg plak merepek. Sbnarnya emo sket ni sbb brp tahun punya pent up ni. As I said earlier, here are some pictures of Aisyah and her friends at Julia's party. First diorg bg dlm an hour kot free play dulu dkt soft play area tu. Then budak2 diajak masuk bilik party, and it was time to blow the candle on the cake (for the bday girl la kan) Then mkn2. Very light je hidangan dia, air juice, crisps, chips, cucumbers, sandwiches, sausages (of coz I had to eye her like a hawk, sbb x semua benda dia bole mkn kan). Then the kiddos were given a choice of dessert, Aisyah had ice cream. Finally ada games like pass the parcel, disco2 dan standard games lain. Aisyah menang runner up on one of the games so dia ada dpt hadiah. Actually, in the end semua budak2 bwk balik party pack, ada sweets, crayons, balloon, etc. Msia pon ada all this, and maybe the food a bit more heavy and fancy pon, but still, it was her first party with school friends, so... She had been invited to another party previously in nursery, but she was unwell so I had to call the bday girl's (Maisy) mom and cancelled. Apapon, adala satu buat kenangan kan...
Kadang ada update, kadang x de update dah blog ni. Mmg susah nak cari masa (or idea) utk write anything. every waking hour is spent thinking of and preparing for the viva, or the big move home *sigh*
To be honest, the last few days aku mcm nak nervous breakdown sorg2. I really didn't want to do this anymore. I felt like makin study, makin byk plak jumpa holes nya, and the more I tried to understand the materials, the less I understood. I even rang my Mum in Msia (twice!) and said I couldn't go through it. I want out. Of coz my family (in Msia and Hubs) said that it was ridiculous. Dah buat 4 thn bole survive, tinggal lg brp minggu je x kan la x bole go on. I was not convinced and went to bed early. Turns out I was just exhausted kot, sbb the next day Alhamdulillah dah x weng.
Actually nya the following days tu I had meetings with co-SV and td dgn my SV. I think they have helped put a lot of my anxieties away. Aku ni pesen mendera diri sendiri pon ye jgk, I nit-picked my thesis so bad, that aku rasa mcm x de benda worth defending dlm tu. But got a few good advice from my SVs, and I have calmed down a bit. Hopefully I will remain this way.
Even the book that I read on viva guidance pon suruh chill out dah at this stage. I need to shop for some viva attire hehe, tp mcm x de mood nak gi sejuk2 ni ke town. Maybe on Saturday ni la kot. Along with some gifts and cards for friends yg bakal ditinggalkan, and also cikgu2 sekolah Aisyah. Aku baru realised je, after tomorrow, she only has a week of schooling left. How heartbreaking is that?!?! I really need to call some friends and let them know we will be moving for good soon, and arrange a meet up before we leave. If I can avoid it I want to wait until dah setel my urusan belajar, but at the same time I don't want to wait until it's too late, sbb nnt kecoh nak packing plak, arghhh!! But hopefully dpt la jumpa walau sekejap cuma... Some people they come into your life skjp aje, but they stay in your heart forever... *srott sretttt*
For this entry I share pictures from 2 weeks ago. Good friends of ours yg rai kan kitaorg in advance. It was such a brilliant evening of good food and great people.We will surely miss them, Aisyah especially will miss their daughter tremendously. I couldn't have come up with a better way to send us off. Ni sedey ni... *tissue please!*
Sejuknya... Most tempat di UK smlm dan hari menerima snow. Plymouth pon khabarnya x ketinggalan, tp sgt sket smlm dlm 10 minutes je pastu jd sleet. Oleh sbb smlm tido kan Aisyah awal utk ke sekolah hari ni, dgn aku2 skali tertido awal makanya terlepas la update rakan2 di FB. Tp suhu mmg -1C smlm. Bgn pg ni mmg dah x de apa la, dah cair. Siap matahari memancar lg (tp sejuk still sejuk dlm 3C). But kalo London dan bhg utara nmpk nya tgk meriah snow tu..
Rumah kosong pon penyebab sejuk gak ni. Ye la, brg dah x de nk menebat haba. Dah shipping kan hari tu. Anyway, x leh nak tulis pjg2. This Wednesday ada meeting dgn co-SV, then Thrusday nya discussion terakhir kot dgn SV sblm masuk bilik viva. Kdg2 x caya journey dah nak berakhir. Dulu2 kalo nak jumpa dia rasa nak demam, skang, tertagih2 plak nak jumpa dia hehe. Lps ni kena pandai gerak sendiri huhu..
Nak gi study. Bkn senang. Pagi2 td setel hal tiket flight, buat appointment sana sini, book taxi ke airport, contact landlord etc,etc... Tau2 study kjp je dah waktu pick up Aisyah from school. Ni Aisyah teman Mummy study sama2. Tgh make notes from thesis. Sendiri tulis, sendiri kritik, sendiri jawab. Susah nak spot soalan. They expect you to know from cover to cover and more huhu. Jap lg nak kena masak plak. Then dinner, then buat homework dgn Aisyah, then it's almost bed time. Cpt nya la masa berlalu oh!
With a heavy heart we let the teachers at Aisyah's school know of our moving back to Msia. Sedih tu of course la sedih, but sooner or later, I knew the day was bound to come, just that it felt like it came too soon *sigh*
The teachers were all very understanding, and said they'll miss Aisyah terribly as Aisyah has been attending for almost 2 years now at the school since Nursery class. She was a quiet little thing when we first started, skang dah bertukar menjadi a bubbly little thing, the 'star' of the class kalo ikut cikgu dia td (org British ni kuat memuji, jgn x tahu, so maybe ikhlas maybe tak statement ni, tp aku think positive je la kan ehehe).And also cikgu dia promise the next few weeks, they'll make sure Aisyah will have a party of a time at school.
Sempena itu, aku pon nak tampal a few bits and bobs yg Aisyah bwk balik since before Xmas break hari tu, tp aku malas nak update sblm ni. Utk pemindahan ni, aku mintak cikgu dia prepare report or whatever progress diary Aisyah yg ada dlm simpanan aku nakkan a copy utk bawak balik. Lain2 art work aku dah shipping balik Msia hari tu.
Here are some Xmas cards that Aisyah got. Ada yg siap bagi candy cane and chewy stuff, tp aku buang aje, but it's the thought that counts kan.
Here are the cards Aisyah made for me.
And here is the present from the teachers to the parents. Gambar anak2 sendiri with such sweet poem. Gmbr Aisyah ni was taken by her class teacher on the 1st day of school last Autumn term.
Ni plak list nama budak2 dlm kelas dia. In a few years, will she still remember any of them? *cue Kopratasa 'Masihkah Kau Ingat'*
